We at Retcon-Nation are gamers and like all gamers, we looked at e3 with an ever critical eye, hoping to discover the next big thing or more information on titles on the horizon. With e3 over for another year, here is our (that's mine and Reece's) top ten titles and hardware from this year (excluding the Wii U as it was far too obvious).
Starting with mine:
10
Forza 4
After the dust settled and Gran Turismo 5 proved to be one of the best punchlines in video game history (only now toppled with Duke Nukem Forever seeing release), all eyes were on the Forza series which has suddenly fount itself the forerunner of the racing simulation genre.
The fourth in the series sees your standard upgrade of more cars, tracks and tweaks that only true racing enthusiasts will notice (which doesn’t include me, my racing games are more centred on Mario Kart), the game also adds Microsoft’s Kinect in a unique way to view cars and controller free steering but also allows the custom paint modifications from Forza 3 (the mode which you can make money from) to be imported over to the new version.
It’s one of the only titles that I as a PS3 owner look in cautious optimism. Can it truly be an actual game that has worthy Kinect features and if so, what would the future hold for the system otherwise?
9
Star Wars: The Old Republic
Before Mass Effect proved that RPG’s could have a deep, engrossing story that didn’t have anime eyed school children save the world from Satan, Bioware’s Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic series was a spectacular affair.
Set thousands of years before the prequel trilogies, the game dealt with the on-going Sith and Jedi war on numerous worlds with interesting characters, surprisingly fun combat and enough shocking plot twists to keep the story engaging for all forty of so hours of play (these traits being thankfully carried into the Mass Effect series).
Well this year, Bioware attempts to topple World of Warcraft dominance with an MMORPG of its own. Set several centuries after the events of KOTOR II, The Old Republic may finally offer Star Wars fans the chance to be involved in the Star Wars universe (a decade after Sony previously failed with Star Wars Galaxy).
Incorporating the combat from the original titles along with role swapping to allow teams to balance out for future quests amongst other things, Bioware has a potential monster on its hands and I’ll be very interested to see how it plays out. Let’s just hope its more Original Trilogy then Prequels.
8
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3
Every year the hype train begins to gain momentum and with a increasingly more successful backlog of chart topping and record breaking titles, Activision’s Call of Duty franchise reaches a third iteration with it’s Modern Warfare series.
Whilst Modern Warfare 2 was an engorged and poorly told story with a multiplayer mode full of broken mechanics that didn’t enhance anything and simply failed to build on its predecessor, its sequel, the first not developed by Infinity Ward hopes to keep the series going and not turn the series into a dead horse.
While I remain cautious at the title (as I was with Black Ops), like an battered housewife, I see myself helplessly jumping on board to try and rekindle the fantastic time I had with the original Modern Warfare. It has a lot to live up to and a hell of a competition against one particular title on the list, but this being Call of Duty, anything is possible.
7
Super Mario 3D
Super Mario Galaxy and its sequel are modern day masterpieces and the prospect of a 3D iteration with more ties to the original NES and SNES titles is wank fodder for Nintendo fanboys.
Colourful visuals, 3D actually enhancing the title to make jumps easier rather than being a hindrance and a return of several powerups including the much loved/insane Tanuki suit, the 3DS may finally have a killer app, that isn’t a remake of an N64 title.
6
Playstation Vita
The original PSP was too early for it’s time, it lacked big titles and was mainly used as a source for homebrew and emulation. Sony’s next portable hardware plans to up the ante and well, it just might.
A slightly different piece of equipment with two analogue sticks for true 3D gaming, a high quality screen offering the best visuals for a portable system, touchscreen and augmented reality controls on the back of the system to give a more immersive control system, triple A titles such as Uncharted and LittleBigPlanet and a relatively decent price, expect big things from the Vita and hope it doesn’t lose momentum like the PSP before it.
5
Battlefield 3
Whilst MW3 has a multi million dollar advertising campaign and over half a decade of huge titles to fall back on, EA’s Battlefield series may finally become the number one FPS game to earn in 2011 with it’s third entry to the main series.
Whilst it’s single player mode can be acknowledged for lacking the Hollywood gloss that Activision gives COD, Battlefield 3’s multiplayer mode, expanding on the previous entries in the series, could well be a trump card this winter. Vehicles, destructible environments, actual team based deathmatches that require teamwork and superior graphics, only time will tell if this can finally topple COD’s grip on the FPS and that time is a short 3 months away.
4
Assassin’s Creed: Revelations
Brotherhood ended on a huge cliff-hanger and thank Xenu that the wait for the final part in the Ezio trilogy is resolved this Christmas.
Featuring a new locale, the return of Altair from the original, enhanced multiplayer and if the game’s e3 trailer and gameplay is go by, fans will have another fantastic entry into the series, before the eagerly awaited third title arrives with in the next year or possibly in time for a new console launch.
3
The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
Whilst Nintendo’s big unveiling of the Wii U was the talk of e3, credit has to go to its own fanbase for not losing more of their minds in the wait for Skyward Sword.
Unveiled back in 2008 when the Wii was becoming the derided, shovelware spoilt dust collector it remained up until this day, Skyward Sword was Nintendo’s big attempt at not only demonstrating its new equipment in the form of the Motion Plus but also as an attempt to show it’s hardcore gamers that it still remembered them from the dark days of the Gamecube.
Well we’re nearing what is again promised the definitive release date with slightly more information. We know there’ll be flying, we know there’s a new villain and we know the sword fighting has been updated to be like, you know, actual sword fighting.
Much like Twilight Princess being the swan-song for the Gamecube, Skyward Sword approaches at the end of the Wii’s lifecycle and it’ll be interesting to see if the fifth incarnation in 3D can reinvent the series for sceptics and keep the fans happy. This being Nintendo, expect more of the latter and less of the former but hey, at least it’ll finally be out.
2
Uncharted 3
The Playstation 3’s darling franchise releases it’s third entry to much hype and anticipation and it’s little wonder why. The original; a short but relatively sweet debut featured relatively decent gameplay and at the time, gorgeous visuals.
Two years later, developers Naughty Dog took the imperfections of Drake’s Fortune and created a modern masterpiece in Among Thieves. A longer, more emotional story, even better graphics, touched up gameplay mechanics and a surprisingly fun multiplayer option made the title Game of the Year for many.
Two years from then, Drake returns this Christmas with the prospect of another rip roaring adventure. Plot details have remained thin but the stunning trailers have hyped up a must have title for all PS3 owners this year. Even better visuals, touched up gameplay including better hand to hand combat and more multiplayer modes including co-op, Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception is a safe pick for GOTY in a year where several triple A titles battle it out in Q4.
1
Batman: Arkham City
To say Arkham Asylum was a surprisingly good title is like saying Avatar had a decent box office intake. It may have taken several years, but British developer Rocksteady did the impossible and created a great Batman game.
Two years on, they plan to deliver a sequel which truly encapsulates the idea of a sequel; make it bigger and better than the original. Taking place a year after the events of Arkham Asylum, the slums of Gotham have been cordoned off by new Mayor Sharpe who let’s the inmates run wild in a sprawling section of pure crime.
Players take control again of The Dark Knight as he battles with old adversaries The Joker and The Riddler but making their debuts to the series Two Face, Hugo Strange, the Penguin and many, many more.
Featuring a huge open world environment with new gadgets, new abilities and a side story involving Catwoman, Arkham City could well be the best Comic Adaptation ever for a home console, if it can hopefully surpass it’s incredible predecessor and is my game of e3 2011.
And last but certainly not least, Reece's list:
10. Star Wars Kinect
- Considering we will probably never get a game where we will actually hold a Lightsabre makes this game look pretty nifty. Kinect is something that I am still sceptical about but if this years E3 showed anything it’s that MS are looking to expand and bring some big titles to the platform. SW:K looks fun, time will tell but it’s the only game on Kinect that’s actually made me consider getting myself the hardware.
09. Star Wars: The Old Republic
- Another Star Wars game?! Well yes, being a huge fan of the first KOTOR I was intrigued to hear they would be turning this into a MMORPG, games that I vowed to never ever play and still retain that vow.
This game however looks decent, the rendered cut scenes they have been showing us for months have all looked impressive, E3 was a good chance to see some game play and it didn’t look all that bad, I was impressed with the scope and the attention to the Star Wars universe, but at the end of the day it really is just more money in the beardy gits pocket isn’t it?
08. Playstation Vita
- Portable gaming isn’t really my thing, I’ll leave the 3DS to the 12 year old Japanese girls and their Nintendogs but the PSP was a great portable when it was first released and I had some really great train journeys with it. This new incarnation of that device looks brilliant and some of the game play footage shown for games such as Uncharted looks utterly brilliant. 3G models are on the way also so portable gaming looks like it is going into the future in a big way.
07. Uncharted 3
- I don’t own a PS3 myself, but if I did buy one it would be for the Uncharted series, they always look good fun and when I saw what’s coming up for UC3 well I was very impressed. It will certainly be a GOTY contender if not winner, but I think it will be trumped by a few other games.
Not taking away from this game and the series, they are top notch games that I will be playing properly one of these days instead of sitting in some ones bedroom getting used to the PS3 controller again. If I was a PS3 user chances are this would be my #1 but I’m not so live with it!
06. The Legend of Zelda: The Skyward Sword
- Ah Zelda, since OOT hit us for 6 on the N64 the games have taken a great turn and they are always good fun, I wasn’t a huge fan of Twilight Princess but it had its moments. This game however looked great in the footage shown, they don’t seem to be straying too far from the 3D view that was birthed with OOT but the visuals looked great and hopefully they can do some better with the Wii motion controls than TP did.
Zelda still has a lot to offer us gamers and with the Wii-U coming soon I think this could be the start of some good titles for the series.
05. Hitman Absolution
- The Hitman franchise is a personal favourite of mine, now I know little game play was shown to the public at E3, there was however some very detailed accounts of the private showings so this still counts! Also there’s bit and pieces on youtube. Since Blood Money we have heard hardly anything about a new addition to the HM series, a series that in my opinion is fantastic. Well now we have news, Agent 47 is back and looks like he’s had some changes to his mechanics, more emphasis on the action and it looks like 47 is much more of a hunted man this time around.
The game play shown of him being hunted by multiple police officers looked great as did the new cover system. The visuals don’t look all that much improved over Blood Money (which still remains one of my favourite games) but there is a lot of work to do and I think we have a great game on our hands. I can’t wait.
04. Bioshock: Infinite
- The Bioshock games so far have been up and down, the first game developed by Irrational Games was nothing short of a masterpiece.
Ken Levine who writes and develops the story knows his onions and the man who created Rapture has now created Columbia, a city in the sky. Bioshock 2 was a respectable addition to the series but to some hardcore fans Infinite is the real successor to the first game considering Irrational had nothing to do with BS2.
The visuals look great, the game play looks intense; an important part of the BS universe. Not much on the story has been revealed and only small tidbits about the new incarnation of the Big Daddies have surfaced but the game looks utterly brilliant at the moment. The new tonics look fun and it looks like we will be waiting for a while longer for more big details.
They announced this game last year with a 2012 release date, which for me was too soon considering they had trailers and game play to show us last year already, but the hype is building and this game has GOTY contender written all over it.
03. Assassins Creed Revelations
- When it comes to games I only ask for a few things, have a great story and great game play, not much to ask I think.
The story of AC1 was great, it hooked me in but the game play was never quite there, that all changed with AC2 and then AC: Brotherhood came along as added even more to the mix. It seems the same can be said for Revelations, the next instalment in a fantastic series. We are on a cliff-hanger from AC:B and we are told that this game will reveal the end for Ezio AND Altair, our elusive hero from the first game.
The game play footage shown so far doesn’t look like it’s the total engine overhaul many fans expected but the action looks great and it looks like there is going to be some serious customization on the weapons front, something that really does intrigue me.
Assassins Creed is known for its story, I don’t think there are many games out there that rival it, the concept was brilliant from the get go and if anything the only thing the games have lacked is more new characters and maybe some more odd and exotic locations. In Revelations we will play as Desmond, Ezio and Altair, it sounds very varied this time around and I can only see this game setting up AC3 next year with a big bang.
The series has sold millions upon millions of copies and I doubt AC3 will be the end of the franchise but this game has all the hallmarks of a classic: bigger and better than all of its predecessors, something the franchise can boast they do regularly.
02. Battlefield 3
- I don’t say this as a fan boy (HA I totally do…) but if you want a proper war game then Battlefield will always be the best choice. For some reason Call of Duty has taken over and for some unknown reason it’s considered to be a good franchise, well call me a BF fan boy but the COD games are awful. 6 hour storylines with cramped multiplayer levels full of glitches and people taking advantage of overpowered guns just doesn’t do it for me.
Battlefield 3 looks insane. EA (I know right?) know that this franchise is better than COD; of course they will never out sell the COD franchise because most gamers are idiots but Battlefield 3 looks nothing short of immense. You see, the guys who develop BF like to change stuff, make it as realistic as possible but not just throw stupid gimmicks at it for the sake of it looking cool in the trailer.
Bad Company 2 was a fantastic game that had immense Multiplayer, because that’s what we are looking at really isn’t it? Who can honestly say they bought a COD game for the storyline alone? Multiplayer is where these games make or break and Battlefield will win every time with anyone who knows what they are talking about.
Battlefield 3 has improved visuals over the last Bad Company outing; the immense Frostbite engine has been improved to 2.0 so guys who like to camp? Well sorry fellas’ you will not be able to hide for long. Buildings can be destroyed, walls can be knocked down. This is the closest you will get to a real battlefield scenario without actually signing up.
The maps are huge and the game modes have more going for them. The weapons are always a joy in the Battlefield games and the unlocking system is always far more challenging. The story mode looks like it has been well thought out with game play as its main focus, not where and who you shoot. Battlefield 3 will not need a controversial mission to get it in the headlines, you won’t need to kill civilians nor do things that are strangely linked to real life terrorist acts, because we don’t want to give them any recognition do we? This game is going to be brilliant; the game play shown at E3 was both intense and more importantly showed NEW features.
This game will be a COD killer, maybe not in the sales market which is the important one sadly but in the minds of real gamers.
01. Batman: Arkham City
So here’s my number 1, Arkham City looks nothing short of breathtaking. Whether you are a comic book reader or a fan of Batman this game will be brilliant.
Arkham Asylum was a stunning debut for the series and Rock Steady teased us about the plans for the sequel at the end of the game. So here it is, Arkham City is nearly upon us and at E3 we saw a demo being played and by lordy does it look immense! Batman is now out of the confines of Arkham Asylum, where the baddies of Gotham reside after getting their ass kicked. The governor of Arkham has decided to give the villains more space and has turned Arkham Asylum into a small scale city.
Good plan or is it likely to give our caped crusader another reason to pop in and kick some more ass? The latter it seems! The demo showed us Arkham city in all its glory, a massive open world where Batman can glide around at will, swinging between buildings and dropping down to smash a gang of bad guys who have innocents cornered. We saw some of the mission game play and a small section of the plot. Catwoman is a surprise playable character and fans of the Batverse have been very pleased about that, I know I am.
Arkham City sees the appearance of some of the high profile villains that didn’t feature in AA, Two Face is going to be a big bad as is the Riddler and Penguin, with some notable returns from the first game I would assume. Detective vision was shown off again and this time it has been dumbed down slightly, no more spending the whole game with it on. The main story line will last up to 15-16 hours which is good for today’s standards, more impressive is the 10+ hours of side missions and riddles that have also been announced.
This is going to be my GOTY and I think a lot of other places will be saying the exact same thing. Rock Steady has upped the stakes and the scale, AA had its faults and if those are addressed then AC is going to be a classic. Boss fights in AA were a big disappointment most of the time, I can see this being the make or break of AC, the setting, characters and story all look like winners, lets just hope they can get the small bits and pieces that really do make a great game spot on.
Thursday, 23 June 2011
Thursday, 9 June 2011
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides Review
The house of mouse maybe well renown for mentally scaring children with the prospects of parents dying before the main character becomes king of the jungle/forest/amalgamated European kingdom by facing down embodiment of evil, but they should also be famous of the amount of sequels said classic tales have received.
Of course this mentality is usually only applied to Disney’s foray of animated films which always have closure and have an unnecessary (and usually terrible) numbered entry whilst their live action movies rarely stand alone. Of course the question is raised for how far you can keep the beast running before it begins to rot away and be a caricature of its former youthful self.
And this is where nearly 95% of people would say Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean franchise should never have been franchise and simply the mildly fun but immensely overrated original as just that instead of the over bloated, confusing mess it spawned.
Unfortunately I’m in the 5% camp who fount not only the original movie The Curse of the Black Pearl an enjoyable popcorn romp with a decent plot and one of the best breakout characters in cinema history, but I also enjoyed it’s two sequels for the same reasons (despite the third being a said over-bloated, confusing mess).
Of course you could argue that once a movie goes beyond a trilogy in the unattractive regions of a fourth, you’re no longer doing it for artistic integrity and character development but rather so you can get that magical gold platted yacht or payoff that costly divorce.
So four years after the believed conclusion, someone at Disney probably really wanted that gold yacht because the fourth entry in the series On Stranger Tides has hit theatres against a tirade of non-interest and questions of how many times Johnny Depp can honestly captivate audiences as a “rock-star pirate”?
Set a number of years after the conclusion of At World’s End, Captain Jack Sparrow is in England, trying to uncover an impostor who is trying to gather a crew to find the Fountain of Youth. This culminates in a series of events that has Jack join terrifying pirate Blackbeard (played by Deadwood actor Ian McShane) and his crew including Penelope Cruz with Jack’s first mate Gibbs join newly made Privateer Barbossa (played once again by Geoffrey Rush) to beat the Spaniards from discovering the fountain first in a fun filled race of constant betrayals, a bizarrely high body count and strange environments as the title suggests.
All in all, it’s a road trip movie, except replace the road with the ocean and strange locals with carnivorous mermaids.
Naturally you’d assume that Disney must surely be taking the mickey (the turn of phrase, not the mouse) by creating a sequel to a story that was closed and depending on how much you like Pirates of the Caribbean will probably determine how much you like this entry.
Whilst On Stranger Tides is thankfully streamlined from At World’s End, it’s still unnecessarily padded to give the movie an epic scope and is adds nothing new to the franchise. Ian McShane’s role as Blackbeard, while decent, is no where near as diabolical as his real life counter-part and despite Penelope Cruz being probably the best female actress the franchise has ever seen, her character is purely there to give Jack a female love interest.
There’s a strange sequence of events that even the film states sounds ridiculous and it’s never clear what exactly Cruz’s Angelica character is supposed to do. Is she a con-artist out for revenge or is she merely someone trying to protect a loved one? It’s one thing to make characters vague for the prospect of resolution later, but then there’s just lazy writing which offers no hints and then leaves us wondering why the character is even there in the first place.
Moving this aside, On Stranger Tides is your stereotypical summer blockbuster with some good set-pieces and CGI that’s nice and easy on the eyes. I didn’t watch this one in 3D like I did with Thor but you lose nothing watching it on bog-standard 2D. There’s a few shots intentionally made for 3D but there relatively short and offer nothing substantial to the main story.
On the whole, On Stranger Tides is shorter and slightly sweeter sequel to its predecessors. It has an all-star cast of quality actors, a decent story even if it boils down to nothing happening with a good soundtrack and maintaining the established universe’s aesthetics.
For those who enjoyed the previous trilogy, you’ll find nothing particularly bad with it other than it lacking the epic scope of the previous two entries and a possible empty feeling that it's existence is simply to make a quick buck. For everyone else, it’s a standard popcorn flick that offers nothing new to an ailing franchise that should have been taken out to pasture nearly a decade ago that will no doubt continue surviving (especially with the prospect of Burton and Depp teaming up for the fifth movie…god help us).
6/10
Of course this mentality is usually only applied to Disney’s foray of animated films which always have closure and have an unnecessary (and usually terrible) numbered entry whilst their live action movies rarely stand alone. Of course the question is raised for how far you can keep the beast running before it begins to rot away and be a caricature of its former youthful self.
And this is where nearly 95% of people would say Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean franchise should never have been franchise and simply the mildly fun but immensely overrated original as just that instead of the over bloated, confusing mess it spawned.
Unfortunately I’m in the 5% camp who fount not only the original movie The Curse of the Black Pearl an enjoyable popcorn romp with a decent plot and one of the best breakout characters in cinema history, but I also enjoyed it’s two sequels for the same reasons (despite the third being a said over-bloated, confusing mess).
Of course you could argue that once a movie goes beyond a trilogy in the unattractive regions of a fourth, you’re no longer doing it for artistic integrity and character development but rather so you can get that magical gold platted yacht or payoff that costly divorce.
So four years after the believed conclusion, someone at Disney probably really wanted that gold yacht because the fourth entry in the series On Stranger Tides has hit theatres against a tirade of non-interest and questions of how many times Johnny Depp can honestly captivate audiences as a “rock-star pirate”?
Set a number of years after the conclusion of At World’s End, Captain Jack Sparrow is in England, trying to uncover an impostor who is trying to gather a crew to find the Fountain of Youth. This culminates in a series of events that has Jack join terrifying pirate Blackbeard (played by Deadwood actor Ian McShane) and his crew including Penelope Cruz with Jack’s first mate Gibbs join newly made Privateer Barbossa (played once again by Geoffrey Rush) to beat the Spaniards from discovering the fountain first in a fun filled race of constant betrayals, a bizarrely high body count and strange environments as the title suggests.
All in all, it’s a road trip movie, except replace the road with the ocean and strange locals with carnivorous mermaids.
Naturally you’d assume that Disney must surely be taking the mickey (the turn of phrase, not the mouse) by creating a sequel to a story that was closed and depending on how much you like Pirates of the Caribbean will probably determine how much you like this entry.
Whilst On Stranger Tides is thankfully streamlined from At World’s End, it’s still unnecessarily padded to give the movie an epic scope and is adds nothing new to the franchise. Ian McShane’s role as Blackbeard, while decent, is no where near as diabolical as his real life counter-part and despite Penelope Cruz being probably the best female actress the franchise has ever seen, her character is purely there to give Jack a female love interest.
There’s a strange sequence of events that even the film states sounds ridiculous and it’s never clear what exactly Cruz’s Angelica character is supposed to do. Is she a con-artist out for revenge or is she merely someone trying to protect a loved one? It’s one thing to make characters vague for the prospect of resolution later, but then there’s just lazy writing which offers no hints and then leaves us wondering why the character is even there in the first place.
Moving this aside, On Stranger Tides is your stereotypical summer blockbuster with some good set-pieces and CGI that’s nice and easy on the eyes. I didn’t watch this one in 3D like I did with Thor but you lose nothing watching it on bog-standard 2D. There’s a few shots intentionally made for 3D but there relatively short and offer nothing substantial to the main story.
On the whole, On Stranger Tides is shorter and slightly sweeter sequel to its predecessors. It has an all-star cast of quality actors, a decent story even if it boils down to nothing happening with a good soundtrack and maintaining the established universe’s aesthetics.
For those who enjoyed the previous trilogy, you’ll find nothing particularly bad with it other than it lacking the epic scope of the previous two entries and a possible empty feeling that it's existence is simply to make a quick buck. For everyone else, it’s a standard popcorn flick that offers nothing new to an ailing franchise that should have been taken out to pasture nearly a decade ago that will no doubt continue surviving (especially with the prospect of Burton and Depp teaming up for the fifth movie…god help us).
6/10
Tuesday, 7 June 2011
The Hangover Part II Review
Imagine working in an office and you’re working on the mundane task of photocopying. You’ve spent all day refining your craft on this boring repetitive work but everything is pristine and you’re proud of how it’s all gone, you may even have some pride in your work.
Sadly you happened to do this the day before the office Christmas party where some witless Neanderthal has decided to take your pristine work and use it as ammunition for the ultimate prank, scanning photocopies of his lower regions.
So you come in after Christmas, waiting for your acknowledgment of all the hard work you’ve done and everyone points the finger, wanting an explanation of why this atrocious, seedy, strangely dark and non-funny joke as it were was created and why you’ve gone out of your way to ruin a perfectly good thing prior.
Metaphor over; The Hangover Part II.
Two years ago, the highest grossing R Rated comedy in film history was unleashed and boy howdy was it a fun ride. Four friends go to Las Vegas for an unforgettable stag-do which results in everyone forgetting a chaotic night with the groom missing.
What sounded simple on paper was a total riot with all the hall markings of a modern classic. It had the iconic characters, the fantastic jokes, possibly one of the most surreal cameos in film history (topped only by Bill Murray’s appearance in Zombieland) and on the whole, it was a fun, unpredictable film.
Naturally this being the worst recession for a century and it being a comedy, a sequel has been released for what I initially hoped would be an expansion on the characters in a brand new situation which could test new comedic situat…hahaha
Just kidding!
Simply put The Hangover Part II will forever be seen as the benchmark of copying and pasting the exact same movie. You could go so far to say that Part II is a remake since the premise is practically identical from the original.
For those who never saw the original (in which case; why?), The Hangover Part II has Stu the dentist (played by Daily Show alumni Ed Helms) is getting married to someone who isn’t Heather Graham but rather Lauren. Lauren and Stu’s wedding is set to take place in Thailand and the wolf pack in reunited (with Lauren’s younger brother Teddy played by Mason Lee added to the mix)
After deciding not to chance another Vegas, the gang decide to have one beer to celebrate Stu’s impending third marriage and subsequently wake up in a Bangkok hotel room with no memory of the night before, Teddy missing and a number of strange occurrences taking place in the room. The gang have to piece together the night before, find Teddy and get to the wedding on time.
So yes, tweak the names and add a new locale, the film is exactly the same as the original minus minor alterations. So naturally, your guessing that even if the film a carbon copy of the original, surely it would have all the humour from the original despite, you know, already seeing and hearing these gags once before.
And this is where the film falls flat. The jokes from two years ago are generally the same this time around, although the film makers have upped the ante so to speak by making everything much darker and depraved from before to add a sense of escalation.
The problem is the film pushes the envelope so far, it leaves the room and ends up on a different planet altogether. The original was a fun picture with likable characters finding themselves in multiple surreal but ultimately resolvable scenarios whilst the sequel finds the same characters in scenarios that simply aren’t funny and for nealy 90% of the time, are simply there to inflict punishment on those of us stupid enough to invest in the characters.
Two examples of this (and spoilers ahoy for the next paragraph); The gang finds themselves in a stripper bar trying to find where they went next (much like the wedding chapel from last time, it even had the same actor playing the owner), here we discover that Stu again proposed to a stripper (again like last time) which he said no and instead had sex with the stripper who turns out to be a ladyboy. There’s another example of this where the gang is attacked by gangsters (this time Russian as opposed to Chinese) and Phil is shot in the street (which is quickly glanced over throughout the film as simply a graze).
Whilst the original did have its raunchiness and placed our characters in often difficult situations, there was never any overt cruelty and our characters were only punished temporarily. Here they are constantly pushed to their limits and are patience is tested time and time again. The payoff at the end of the film for all the suffering simply isn’t worth it and the ending also provides another surreal celebrity cameo, although it’s simply there again to join the dots to the far superior original.
All in all, The Hangover Part II is a dark, immensely cruel and most offensive of all, unfunny carbon copy of the distinctive and superior original. It’s insulting to think the filmmakers think they could get away with retelling the exact same film to the audience but hey, we’re all the more foolish for hoping for something special (and in my case, going to see it anyway).
For all three of you who never saw the original, you may get a kick out of it, it does have the occasional good line and full credit to all the leads for doing there best. For those who have already seen the original, await the inevitable Youtube mashup which will sync the scenes to show just how lazy a film can be.
You’ll get far more enjoyment out of that than watching this and consuming the amount
of mind bleach needed to forget this debacle.
3/10
H
Sadly you happened to do this the day before the office Christmas party where some witless Neanderthal has decided to take your pristine work and use it as ammunition for the ultimate prank, scanning photocopies of his lower regions.
So you come in after Christmas, waiting for your acknowledgment of all the hard work you’ve done and everyone points the finger, wanting an explanation of why this atrocious, seedy, strangely dark and non-funny joke as it were was created and why you’ve gone out of your way to ruin a perfectly good thing prior.
Metaphor over; The Hangover Part II.
Two years ago, the highest grossing R Rated comedy in film history was unleashed and boy howdy was it a fun ride. Four friends go to Las Vegas for an unforgettable stag-do which results in everyone forgetting a chaotic night with the groom missing.
What sounded simple on paper was a total riot with all the hall markings of a modern classic. It had the iconic characters, the fantastic jokes, possibly one of the most surreal cameos in film history (topped only by Bill Murray’s appearance in Zombieland) and on the whole, it was a fun, unpredictable film.
Naturally this being the worst recession for a century and it being a comedy, a sequel has been released for what I initially hoped would be an expansion on the characters in a brand new situation which could test new comedic situat…hahaha
Just kidding!
Simply put The Hangover Part II will forever be seen as the benchmark of copying and pasting the exact same movie. You could go so far to say that Part II is a remake since the premise is practically identical from the original.
For those who never saw the original (in which case; why?), The Hangover Part II has Stu the dentist (played by Daily Show alumni Ed Helms) is getting married to someone who isn’t Heather Graham but rather Lauren. Lauren and Stu’s wedding is set to take place in Thailand and the wolf pack in reunited (with Lauren’s younger brother Teddy played by Mason Lee added to the mix)
After deciding not to chance another Vegas, the gang decide to have one beer to celebrate Stu’s impending third marriage and subsequently wake up in a Bangkok hotel room with no memory of the night before, Teddy missing and a number of strange occurrences taking place in the room. The gang have to piece together the night before, find Teddy and get to the wedding on time.
So yes, tweak the names and add a new locale, the film is exactly the same as the original minus minor alterations. So naturally, your guessing that even if the film a carbon copy of the original, surely it would have all the humour from the original despite, you know, already seeing and hearing these gags once before.
And this is where the film falls flat. The jokes from two years ago are generally the same this time around, although the film makers have upped the ante so to speak by making everything much darker and depraved from before to add a sense of escalation.
The problem is the film pushes the envelope so far, it leaves the room and ends up on a different planet altogether. The original was a fun picture with likable characters finding themselves in multiple surreal but ultimately resolvable scenarios whilst the sequel finds the same characters in scenarios that simply aren’t funny and for nealy 90% of the time, are simply there to inflict punishment on those of us stupid enough to invest in the characters.
Two examples of this (and spoilers ahoy for the next paragraph); The gang finds themselves in a stripper bar trying to find where they went next (much like the wedding chapel from last time, it even had the same actor playing the owner), here we discover that Stu again proposed to a stripper (again like last time) which he said no and instead had sex with the stripper who turns out to be a ladyboy. There’s another example of this where the gang is attacked by gangsters (this time Russian as opposed to Chinese) and Phil is shot in the street (which is quickly glanced over throughout the film as simply a graze).
Whilst the original did have its raunchiness and placed our characters in often difficult situations, there was never any overt cruelty and our characters were only punished temporarily. Here they are constantly pushed to their limits and are patience is tested time and time again. The payoff at the end of the film for all the suffering simply isn’t worth it and the ending also provides another surreal celebrity cameo, although it’s simply there again to join the dots to the far superior original.
All in all, The Hangover Part II is a dark, immensely cruel and most offensive of all, unfunny carbon copy of the distinctive and superior original. It’s insulting to think the filmmakers think they could get away with retelling the exact same film to the audience but hey, we’re all the more foolish for hoping for something special (and in my case, going to see it anyway).
For all three of you who never saw the original, you may get a kick out of it, it does have the occasional good line and full credit to all the leads for doing there best. For those who have already seen the original, await the inevitable Youtube mashup which will sync the scenes to show just how lazy a film can be.
You’ll get far more enjoyment out of that than watching this and consuming the amount
of mind bleach needed to forget this debacle.
3/10
H
Sunday, 5 June 2011
Arctic Monkeys - Suck It and See Review
2006 may not seem far away in the context of things but it seems like a lifetime ago when Yorkshire four piece Arctic Monkeys broke away from their rapid rise on MySpace to conquer the British charts with arguably one of the best debut albums of the past decade.
Evoking the lyrical styling’s of Jarvis Cocker with punchy basslines, thunderous drums and easy on the ears guitars, NME’s newest messiah’s looked set to conquer music and finally save rock and roll (despite The Strokes accomplishing this feat only five years earlier).
And while they’re not the best live band (actually scratch that, FAR from the best live band), a year later they released their follow up Favourite Worst Nightmare, which while terrifying a substantial amount of their fanbase for changing their sound (more on that irony later), FWN was a surprisingly good follow up album, one which I personally think surpasses Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not.
So, in the space of over a year, the band somehow had established itself as a favourite of mine and countless others and I eagerly awaited what their next evolution would bring. Unfortunately, this evolution spouted numerous unnecessary limbs and brought the former beast to a slow halt, drooling away like it’d been given too many hits of stupidity.
Humbug (named after a sweet which you ironically suck or an ole English term for something fraudulent) changed this once energetic, youthful band into Sheffield’s equivalent of Queens of the Stone Age. Gone were the punchy basslines and thunderous drumming, instead replaced with slow, generic stoner rock which would require a bong the size of a tower block to get any sort of enjoyment. Gone were the innuendo filled yet creative lyrics, replaced with clangers such as “Which came first; the chicken or the dickhead?” A lyric neither big nor clever; but incredibly stupid.
Whilst FWN took a while to accept it for the masterpiece it was and terrified those who didn’t immediately get it, Humbug still infuriates me to this day and looked like a death knell. Although there were glimmers of hope (Dance Little Liar, Crying Lightning and Dangerous Animals were standouts), the band’s new direction was, simply put, boring.
Two years later, the band returned by “leaking” Brick by Brick, a song built for sing-a-longs but lacking any cohesion and was quite generic. So naturally I presumed Humbug 2 was on the cards and the band would go the way of Kaiser Chiefs or Hard-Fi.
Then, all was fine again with the release of Don’t Sit Down ‘Cause I’ve Moved Your Chair. Although still lacking the social observations of yesteryear and instead featuring random statements that happened to rhyme (including “Go into business with a grizzly bear”), the track was a roaring beast with loud guitars, short but sweet riffs and a welcome return to form whilst being something new.
So with cautious optimism, the aptly title Suck It and See leaked (as all Arctic Monkey albums do) a month early and I hoped for something good. Thankfully, it is a good album, miles better than Humbug and possibly up there with their first two.
For the most part, the dreary, generic sounds of Humbug is replaced with a amalgamation of all three albums prior(although if anything, it sounds far more in common with FWN). For those who want something to headbang to, Library Pictures is two minutes of pure fun. Stupidly fast with Turner’s vocals crooning playfully along before shouting at himself for being indecisive.
For those who want something a bit steadier with more of a flavour to the tracks on Humbug, Black Treacle and The Hellcat Spangled Shalalala brings a return of the social commentary with nice backing tracks which while not too creative, are nice enough. Think Florescent Adolescent, except not getting tedious after a single listen.
For those who want something a bit slower and dramatic (like Only Ones Who Know or Riot Van), Piledriver Waltz is your answer with Turner vocals lament on easing a difficult situation with an almost operatic backing from the band. It’s obviously more complete and fuller than the previous incarnation fount on the Submarine EP and much better for it.
Arguably Humbug’s biggest sins was the lack of a decent finalé, thankfully Suck It and See continues the proud tradition. First is the titular track, a lovely pop melody with possibly one of the best lyrics to be spouted from Turner. It’s in the same vein as Cornerstone last year but has a lot more longevity and is easier on the ears.
Finally this brings us to our triumphant conclusion with That’s Where Your Wrong. Similar musically to A Certain Romance but slightly shorter, our downtrodden protagonist recounts moments of vulnerability as guitars play out an enjoyable four minute suite which is probably the album’s best song.
When all is said and done, Suck It and See is a highly recommended and enjoyable album that brings the Sheffield foursome back to their routes while incorporating their trip to the states on weed and Josh Homme into a groovy bend of mixing the dregs of society with strange yet funny imagery backed with loud, focused guitar riffs and catchy bass and percussion.
Whilst the days of seeing the band get to number one by singing about downtrodden prostitutes, fights at night clubs or a strange man called Brian maybe over, the album is a welcome return to form from a band that some may argue never dipped in quality in the first place.
Suck It and See, you may just learn to love it.
8/10
H
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